It’s been a volatile week. Or rather I’ve been volatile this week. Last weekend was good and productive. I was responsible to organise and conduct a few games at a friends’ baby shower on Sunday and it went pretty smoothly. Well, my first game was a bit of a fail but it was still fun. Ever tried pinning a nappy on a balloon without bursting it? Blindfolded? Yeah. We had some good times.
So we were rested, and had balanced amounts of social time and alone time and started off the week strong. But on Tuesday, I was discouraged. I have a health problem that I am currently dealing with and my visit with my doctor proved that I hadn’t made any major progress. And I know I shouldn’t, but I am hard on myself for that. Why haven’t I gotten better? Why haven’t I figured this out? What am I being anxious and stressed out about? Why can’t I just take control of this thing? Is God being mean to me? And other unreasonablenesses.
And it went kind of downhill from there. And then yesterday, after dinner, Rob and I sat on the couch and I had my second melt-down of the day, not being able to make an ounce of sense of the million-and-one thoughts flying rapidly through my head at any given time.
There used to be a time that I wrote very honestly and raw-ly on my blog. It was in fact, the way my husband first got to know me, even before he had met me. I write way more lucidly than I speak sometimes. And I am able to catch hold of the thoughts that generally bounce around in my brain and put them together in actual sentences.
Then I started a business and became very conscious about my social media presence. And so I bottled up a lot more. Every time I thought of something to write I would think, but that’s been said before. Or that’s too controversial or embarrassing. Or that’s not going to get me any “likes”.
But I need to write.
Honestly. Embarrassingly so if need be.
And share my food pictures with you, no matter how clichéd and “done before” that may well be.
So here goes.
Let’s start with Chana Masala that I made for lunch today that was so surprisingly delicious. You can find the recipe here.